stars and satellites

o47 *

2006-04-25T13:34:00.000+08:00

Your lucky charm is a Four-leaf Clover!

What's Your Lucky Charm?

Brought to you by Tickle

o46 * ex-factor

2006-04-24T17:51:00.000+08:00

It could all be so simple
But you'd rather make it hard
Loving you is like a battle
And we both end up with scars
Tell me, who I have to be
To get some reciprocity
No one loves you more than me
And no one ever will

Is this just a silly game
That forces you to act this way
Forces you to scream my name
Then pretend that you can't stay
Tell me, who I have to be
To get some reciprocity
No one loves you more than me
And no one ever will

No matter how I think we grow
You always seem to let me know
It ain't workin' It ain't workin'
And when I try to walk away
You'd hurt yourself to make me stay
This is crazy
This is crazy

I keep letting you back in
How can I explain myself
As painful as this thing has been
I just can't be with no one else
See I know what we got to do
You let go and I'll let go too
'Cause no one's hurt me more than you
And no one ever will

Care for me, care for me
I know you care for me

There for me, there for me
Said you'd be there for me

Cry for me, cry for me
You said you'd die for me

Give to me, give to me
Why won't you live for me

o45 * speaking of surprises

2006-04-19T14:19:00.000+08:00

my boss was surprised when he found out about my decision to resign. maybe he expected that i would be staying a little bit longer... maybe because he still asked me to help him out with the t2t project recently assigned (or passed on-) to him and maybe because i didn't show any signs or say anything about my plans. the "settling" thing might have added weight to the surprise. all these and his reaction is very understandable and very well expected by me.

a few minutes or maybe an hour ago, JJ noticeably looked at my table and the scattered stuff on it... for the first time. usually, he would just casually pass by my cubicle, ignore whatever it was that i was busy with or even when i'm being unproductive. but this time, he really obviously gazed at my table and it seemed like he was looking for something else.

worried that i was playing my music too loud, i asked, "ano po yun? malakas po ba yung music ko..? sorry...." ..then he replied, "hinde.. ano yan?" .."Updharma Down," i answered gladly. he said, "talaga..? ano pa music mo na kapareho nyan? ..."uhm.. wala na eh.. mga rock na yung iba," i said proudly, smiling.

"how rock?,"he asked. i said, "uhm, punk rock gaya nitong Join the Club, yung iba nasa bahay eh.. Stonefree, Imago.." i forgot what else i mentioned surprised at his interest, and asked why.

i could certainly remember clearly JJ's comment.. rather, reaction to what i just said.. and i would never forget it for the rest of my music-listening life.

he said, "cool.. wala naman.. nakakagulat lang." (*_*)

my mouth said, "ah..hehe" ..but my head was saying, "haha what the heck.. you think i only listen to popular rock..? ..or what wursh wursh people call trash-sell-out music..? hehe ..or maybe he's surprised that we actually have this particular shared taste in music that his bright, blue-eagled coño mind could not seem to withstand. haha (ok, i'm just exaggerating his coñoness... but it did seem like that.. :p)

Pahabol:
oh, btw, a few minutes ago he asked me if i have a Cynthia Alexander CD. told him i lost my Insomnia copy. eh he's looking for the most recent album pala. eh ayoko naman yung album na bago. :p he commented further, "rocker ka pala..." OMG. haha!

***
Here's Pag-Agos by Filipino kick-ass band, Updharma Down.

at sa aking pagkubli
hampas ng araw
pagdamdam ng gabi
tulog ang iyong mga kamay
di na ko makapag-antay

isang umaga muling aahon
at sisikat sa mga panahon
na tayo pang dalawa
masayang nagsasama

buong araw ng pag-agos
kailan ang huling unos
di alam kung tatakbo
kusang lalayo sayo

isang umaga muli ng pag-iisa
walang mayakap at makasama
pusong pilit na sinugatan
landas kong karaniwan

buong araw ng pag-agos
kailan ang huling unos
di alam kung tatakbo
kusang lalayo sayo

malayo man malapit din
ayos lang agos lang

o44 * horo, not homo..

2006-04-18T17:05:00.000+08:00

can you believe how timely and so close to reality this horoscope is to some recent events and some hopeful developments in my life right now..?

Quickie:
There's not much you can do today to make things different, so just let it go.

Overview:
It's time to think about what you want in your life and what you don't. You've got unlimited resources when it comes to people power, so look through your address book. Your pals can help you reach your goals.

(Source: Yahoo)

whoah!

do web company owners really hire fortune tellers to make their horoscopes accurate? ..or do they invent those themselves..? hehe

o43 * it's official....

2006-04-18T12:37:00.000+08:00

i finally submitted my resignation letter last night and my boss read it this morning and he sent me a text message right away...

tyts: talaga? binigla mo ko!

bee: opo.... sorry po....

tyts: that's ok. sa work side, let's discuss wen u come 2day. sa personal side, i always wish you wel, D. u hav been a gud friend and co-worker.

haaay... sarap naman nun! =)

o42 * Resign

2006-04-17T17:01:00.000+08:00

That's right, resign. Resign from places and people who do not bring the best in you. Resign from vices and sins that are slowly but surely eating you up. Resign from falsehood and pretenses. Be true. Have substance. No more japorms. No more papogi. Just give your very best and God will take care of the rest. Resign to God's will and God's plan for you and you will have peace-that peace of Easter, that peace, which the world cannot give or take away. Good luck, and all the best as you walk the Holy Week. The road that leads to true life is never easy, but the assurance is there: It is a road that leads to life, and He himself is on the road with you, every step along the way.

Taken from "Walk, Don't Ride" by Fr. Jerry Orbos.

o41 * Exactly How Holy Will Holy Week Be..?

2006-04-07T18:20:00.000+08:00

yehey!
i'll be going home to pampanga tomorrow..!
i may be depressed right now for some reason, but i'm so freakin' excited to take a one week vacation,
even if i need to try to be holy for one, whole, week!
...despite the fact that i'm bringing home some work.

i am hoping that when i get back to work from vacation, i'd be able to present some good stuff.. well, at least before i exit the company.
i also hope that with this week-long vacation, i'd have a clearer view of who i am, what i want to do and what my plans would be in the next days, weeks, months and years.

i'm really, really, REALLY praying for the best... not just fopr me, but for others as well. as always.

have a blessed Holy Week. don't forget to reflect on your Christian life. ;)

o4o * Hangman [i shot the Walrus]

2006-04-07T13:44:00.000+08:00

ok, i dunno what this song means and what point it wants to deliver, but i enjoy singing it and mimicking bamboo and rico's insane blending and weird articulation of the lyrics.... :p

Koo-koo-ka-choo I shot the eggman
Under an April morning sky
Immersed in capuccino,
and dirty magazines
Like David Sylvian in my dreams
So from the second floor
A violent sound like laughter
Someone screams "St. Francis Square police!"

Pictures in the pond,
floating rather pointlessly
Sont les mots qui vont
"Please knock me down!"
Everyone says he was first
to be king of the underground
Finally, finally, dottee Home and free
Portobello weekender just you and me

Artist: Rivermaya

o39 * 2o million

2006-04-07T13:33:00.000+08:00

20 million diamonds crown the sky tonight
Silence for two lovers’ everything
They tell me whispering’s a virtue, and holding hands’ their game
‘Tis cold, it’s cold

And as I watch the candle (burn/turn) this might (away/to day)
My life collects another yesterday

Alone in the darkness, I am waiting for the one
While lovers wait for the sun, lay I Waiting for the one.

Stalk the streets do lovers in this town tonight
20 million heartbeats holding hands
For them, it’s darkness that’s most precious,
but tell me who can I embrace?
The cold? There’s no one here to hold

Who’ll light the darkness with his (her) name,
heal this blackout pain

Artist: Rivermaya

o38 * Quack!

2006-04-05T12:22:00.000+08:00

Don't you just love and hate him at the same time..?!

"Mmm. Frosted Sugar Bits. The great taste of frosted sugar in bits."

"Hey, Santa, it's me, Johnny. Remember I'm the one that beat you up last year 'cause I thought you were a burglar?"

"Enough about me, now let's talk about... me."

[eating ice cream with a toothache] "Chomp, chomp, chomp, AAAUGH! The PAIN! The Horrible PAIN! Mmmm.... Creamy! Chomp, Chomp, Chomp, AAAUGH! The PAIN! The stabbing knives of pain! Ooh! It's got nuts in it!"

"Hey Foxy Mama, You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me? Hoohah!"

"Dog... donkey... Well, they both start with the letter "N"..."

"Whoa! A castle in the sky! Just like in that fairy tale of Little Red Rumplestiltskin and the Three Bears and Gretel!"

Johnny Bravo: "What do you think, Rubber Ducky?"
Rubber Ducky: "Quack, quack."
Johnny Bravo: "My thoughts exactly!"

oh, yes.. haha take him away!

o37 * Tarot Card

2006-04-04T12:19:00.000+08:00

You Are The Magician

You are powerful and wise - beyond what anyone can see.
Deeply complex, you have the resources to connect to the spiritual and material world.
You posses the knowledge to manipulate your life and the lives around you.
You also have a great healing power, should you choose to use it.

Your fortune:

You have unhidden powers that you have yet to tap into.
Soon, you will better understand how to use your intellect and intuition.
Believe it or not, you will discover how you can manipulate yourself and others for good.
You are at the beginning of a path of spiritual enlightenment.

What Tarot Card Are You?

***
Stardust:
"You are at the beginning of a path of spiritual enlightenment." --I guess, I really am. Especially now that I have made up my mind to leave this company behind and find where I should and want to belong. Some place where I could enjoy and be relaxed but be more productive and happier at the same time.

o36 * Bad Day?

2006-03-31T10:06:00.000+08:00

the smell of coffee and rain reminds me of a man with whom i have shared a number of fun and expensive but annoying evenings of debate and friendship.

***
Where is the moment we need at the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to grey
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on

You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee to go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces everytime
And I don't need no carryin' on

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

***

Stardust:
"Bad Day" by Daniel Powter

o35 * Strange

2006-03-30T13:44:00.000+08:00

You Are Emerald Green

Deep and mysterious, it often seems like no one truly gets you.
Inside, you are very emotional and moody - though you don't let it show.
People usually have a strong reaction to you... profound love or deep hate.
But you can even get those who hate you to come around. There's something naturally harmonious about you.

What Color Green Are You?

You Are 60% Open Minded

You are a very open minded person, but you're also well grounded.
Tolerant and flexible, you appreciate most lifestyles and viewpoints.
But you also know where you stand firm, and you can draw that line.
You're open to considering every possibility - but in the end, you stand true to yourself.

How Open Minded Are You?

*****
Stardust:
ano ba yan.. parang sakto ah....

o34 * Darkness of the Eclipse a Call for Enlightenment

2006-03-30T11:24:00.000+08:00

Below is an astronaut's perspective on the recent Eclipse.

A circle of darkness moving quickly across a lengthy swath of the Earth on Wednesday triggered fascination and reaction from people around the world. An astronaut about to embark on a six-month space mission said that fascination is a reason humans work hard to shed light on the unknown.

The shadow of the moon moved in a northeasterly direction, beginning in Brazil and across the Atlantic, northern Africa, western China and Mongolia. Its longest totality duration was just over four minutes in western Libya, about 1,250 miles south of Tripoli a little after 5 a.m. EST.

Astronaut Jeffrey Williams said the reaction to the eclipse on the day of the launch of the 13th crew of the International Space Station reminds "all of us who work in the space exploration program just what our purpose is, for discovery and exploration, and understanding the unknown."

He said such phenomena have, throughout history, inspired people to explore and discover, "to understand why things like that happen."

Williams, the NASA science officer on the station's Expedition 13 crew, is to launch with E13 Commander Pavel Vinogradov to the station today at 9:30 p.m. EST from the Baikonur Cosmodrome in Kazakhstan, where they spoke to media this morning, to begin their stay in space.

With them will be Marcos Pontes, Brazil's first astronaut, who will spend about eight days on the station and return with the Expedition 12 crew, which is wrapping up its six-month stay in orbit. Pontes said he saw the eclipse as a good omen for the start of the mission.

Vinogradov said he found the event an interesting astronomical phenomenon. He said he had no opinion about whether it was good or bad.

Many people in the path of the eclipse were a good deal more excited about the event. Some likened it to the end of the world while others feared ill effects from the event. Some saw it as a religious experience.

Many, including some Americans who had traveled great distances to see the eclipse, said it was a fascinating and exciting natural phenomenon.

This picture was taken in Krasnoyarsk, Russia, 12:21 UTC.

Vinogradov didn't share their excitement." We just know that the moon was between the Earth and the sun," he said.

o33 * . . . a revelation?

2006-03-29T12:12:00.000+08:00

Your Love Life Secrets Are

Looking back on your life, you will only have one true love.

Although you may have been hurt before, you tend to bring very little scars into new relationships.

You expect a lot from your lover - you want the full package. You tend to be very picky.

In fights, you speak your mind and don't hold back. You know you're right, and you can get quite angry about it.

Getting over a break-up doesn't take long. Easy come, easy go.

Your Love Life Secrets, Revealed

o32 * My Yahoo Horoscope for Today

2006-03-29T12:09:00.000+08:00

Quickie:
If someone is rushing you, they don't respect you. Your timetable is the priority.

Overview:
Friends may try and talk you out of a situation that they think is a potential fiasco, but in which you see nothing but potential. You're right to stay hopeful about this situation. It'll all work out sooner than you think.

o31 * Sometimes I wonder...

2006-03-27T17:56:00.000+08:00

what's the sense of behaving when other people think you're doing otherwise..?

o3o * Remembering the Band

2006-03-27T12:17:00.000+08:00

The first few notes I heard over the radio this morning during my usual short cab trip to the office were so familiar, that it brought back memories of the band, which somehow broke through the scene around six years ago.

I know there's something in the wake of your smile
I get a notion from the look in your eyes [yeah]
You've built a love but that love falls apart
Your little piece of heaven turns too dark

I bugged my friends that we try the then-newly-discovered jam studio in Betis. [You don't know where Betis is unless you're from Pampanga or have gone and conquered the province.] We weren't professionals, nor have we experienced being on stage. I was just this ambitious young lady who was so into music and would want my musician friends get their acts together and strut their stuff on stage... That's when we met the rest of Blue Rock.

Blue rock. They rocked.
While listening to this tune, it reminded me of those days when we still played in selected small towns in Pampanga. Our band leader and guitarist, Joel, would research on which towns would soon be celebrating their fiesta. He would then call a meeting and a band practice - I was still studying in Manila, while they were all in Pampanga. Unfair! haha ..but for the love of performing, I made sure that I would be at the corner of Sta. Rita every Friday afternoon, waiting for a ride to Guagua.

By the time that I arrive at the meeting place, they are all there - complete, almost dehydrated waiting for me [haha at least, they looked dehydrated] and ready for a jam.

Sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile
The precious moments are all lost in the tide [yeah]
They're swept away and nothing is what it seems
The feeling of belonging to your dreams

We've had a few good gigs. I was new at it and new in the scene but they said I didn't suck and they were actually surprised that I knew how to handle it. I struck some wrong notes during practices but I have never failed them during live acts... Deym, I definitely miss those days and nights...

And there are voices that want to be heard.
So much to mention but you can't find the words.
The scent of magic, the beauty that's been
When love was wilder than the wind.

Gigs were fun. These are memories I choose to remember.
I remember a few funny incidents and weird requests.
Here's one: The first time we were playing was at a big fiesta in Guagua on the first day of that year. We were at the venue very early since we were set to play first. We waited for people to gather around. I was so nervous that I couldn't eat, I kept yawning, I wanted to poo and I kept asking my bandmates how they were feeling.

Jen, my cousin, gave me a red apple. She said it was for good luck.

The waiting time passed, the program was about to start in a few minutes. The barangay councilor, who was also the host of the program, approached Joel. Make a wild guess what he wanted us to do..... He wanted us to play and sing the Philippine national anthem..! HAHAHA! Wtf?! *ROFLOL*

Of course, I said no. I thought that it was a very crucial supposedly smart decision that the band needed to make since our first appearnace would define what the band is all about. Imagine what other people would say when asked if they have heard about the Blue Rock -- "Ah, yung kumanta nung national anthem..." *LOL*

We said "no". The barangay councilor could not force us nor could he send us to jail for saying refusing to do so.. So, he sang it himself..haha..and proceeded with the program.

Jen, was I able to thank you for the apple? ...Thanks, I think it worked. The band had other four or five live acts [with me] after that and some requests from other bands to jam with us. But being the fatherly Joel around, he said it wasn't time yet.

Listen to your heart when he's calling for you
Listen to your heart, there's nothing else you can do
I don't know where you're going and I don't know why,
But listen to your heart before you tell him goodbye.

As I mentioned earlier, I was still studying then. Being two hours away from the province made it hard for me to cope with my schedule -- juggling the band, theater and studies is like giving birth to an elephant. I also felt guilty for having kept the rest of the band waiting many times and realize after two or three hours that they were stood up. So, i quitted.

The last thing I heard about Blue Rock is that they have already changed their music from alternative pop rock to a bit of showband-r&b music. Then, most of them, except for Joel and Dexter, got their girlfriends pregnant and married them afterwards. hehe
Joel works in Manila. Dexter now plays with a new Pampanga-based showband-band.

To Joel, Dexter, Ronald and Mr. Keyboardist.... Kudos!

*****
Song: Listen to Your Heart
by Roxette

*Why this song, you ask...? My bandmates made me sing this during rehearsals. haha!

o29 * School Branding [where do you position yourself?]

2006-03-27T09:41:00.000+08:00

HOW DO YOU KNOW ONE WHEN YOU SEE ONE?
Source: a forwarded email

In a grand ballroom party conducted by the Philippine Society of Colleges and Universities, the Chairman of the Board got curious to know what particular schools attended the big celebration. Therefore, he checked out the house where it was all happening. Guess whom he found and where he found them?

UP Diliman - everybody was lined up to the attic to have a fraternity ritual
UP Los Banos - they were in the garden mowing the lawn
UP Manila - they were into "drugs"
Ateneo - they were inside the TV room with a microphone chanting the "BLUE EAGLE" spelling
La Salle - they were eavesdropping
San Beda - some were beside the Ateneans while others were in the bedroom with some Paulinians
St. Paul - they thought they were with the Ateneans
La Consolacion - they wanted to be the Paulinians
Holy Spirit - they want the Paulinians
Miriam - they were beside the room of the Ateneans . . . like always
Assumption - they were inside the bathroom three hours already since arriving
St. Scholastica - they were next in line for the bathroom
CEU - some were doing the dishes while others were busy with the laundry
St. Louis - they were in front of the air conditioner
UE - they don't know what's an air conditioner
UST - they were everywhere
FEU - they were nowhere
MLQU - sob! They were not invited
San Sebastian - How the hell did they pass by security?
Letran - the Security
Mapua - they were fixing the leak in the roof
TIP - they were the ones who created the leak
NU - they were outside the house selling cigarettes
JRC - they were the ones buying
Adamson - went to Luneta instead
Sta. Isabel - they were Adamson's dates
CRC - what the hell is this party for?
PSBA - what the hell is CRC?
NCBA - what the hell is PSBA?
AMA - they were parading with Jolina posters

***
Tawa lang mga kapatid.. =)

o28 * 23

2006-03-23T16:22:00.000+08:00

it's just unusual to not hear anything from you.
especially today being the "OA" that you are when it comes to this.

notice the entry number, too? could this be a phase in history repeating itself?

if there is anything wrong, i would really love to know.

(*_*)

o27 * Admirers of Blue-Collared Workers

2006-03-23T15:37:00.000+08:00

brought by the cab ride i had and discovering that there is a papa-material cab driver out there (unlike the typical smelly, smelly, old cab drivers), i used this status in Yahoo Messenger (YM) last week...

"may gwapo palang taxi driver =)haha"

what's funny is that i received different kinds of responses and reactions from my YM buddies - friends and co-workers.

first, the expected responses from the male species, claiming that they are "gwapo".....

1. iko

"ako yun.... hindi ako taxi driver ................ oo naman, ganda...basta driver sweet lover pa....may maganda din no na driver....hehehe"

2. mad (boss)

"Siyempre naman... Para ding sinabi mo: "May guwapo pala sa (insert company name here)..."

3. ateng

"di naman ako nag taxi driver ah?"

*******

Some reactions were of to bash me. Here's one..

chadd : hoy mahiya ka nga! pati taxi driver...
bee : LOL
bee : hoi! kmukha nmn ng eyes and nose nya yung kay ryan philippe..... san ka pa?!
chadd : :-S .. SA LAHAT NG TAGA (insert company name)!!! EXCUSE ME
chadd : Announcement lang... paki ligawan naman to si Bee oh... please lang... :)
bee : LOL .. baliw! may bf na ko...
chadd : ....ay onga pala ...naku
chadd : OK OK...SA LAHAT ULIT NG TAGA (insert company name)...
chadd : AKO! Ako na lang ang ligawan nyo....
bee : LOL

*******

And then, there were these three women who admitted to their long-hidden desires for blue-collared job workers. The next batch of responses are from friends who have had similar experiences and may have had stronger feelings for their blue-collared crushes compared to my moment with the cute cab driver.... ;p ..(may moment factor..?!haha)

1. Flub

"pre,tricycle driver nga nun me crush me e nung (nasa) diamond (subdivision) pa kami, kagwapo ng loko pabalik balik me main gate just to ride... bakla nga ata me...."

(*Flub is a very confused individual.... i guess, up until now she doesn't know which is her preference gender. :p)

2. Chichay

"ako me nakita waiter sa Cotabato kamukha ni Borgy Manotoc.. hehehe ..ako yung waiter lagi nilalagyan refill yung inumin ko... e hini naman refillable yun ice tea dun... pero ang gwapohhhhhhh!"

(*Borgy Manotoc is a sexy male model very well known here in the Philippines for his abs and good looks. ;>)

3. Banana

"ako diiin, dati.... sa karpentero.. hahaha basta drayver sweet lover .. naks! ..basta carpenter, sweet lover! asteeeegg"

later this week, she added a new story....

"Ayyy nasabi ko na ba sayo na si SAM ay may tricycle sa kanila? at marunong sha magdrive... at ... imagine that buo ang pantasya sa blue collar love interests haha o diba , yun ang means of transpo namin pag andun sa kanila. hay di ko nga maimagine na magkakaboyfren ako na ganyan ano. probinsyanong tricycle driver na naka chinelas . at least di nakikipaginuman ng nakahubad sa kanto. Yung may tato pa... pag may dumadaang babae... " Hi mezz"

the tattoo conversation is a different story... =)

*******

Just to clarify:

this entry might create a notion that the individuals mentioned here and the author herself thinks too highly of themselves and finds delight looking down on other people.

pleeease. no, that is NOT the case.

definitely, the individuals mentioned in this entry have respect for and salute people who have odd jobs because despite of poverty and the difficulty to find job nowadays, they have their pride, principles and conscience intact and chooses to have decent jobs. no matter how odd others may see it.

note that, each person has his/her own definition of "oddness". for example, a lawyer may find it odd to be working at a fastfood chain as a kitchen crew. just as the author actually finds her attachment to the company she's working for very odd. :p

this entry is merely a sharing of conversations and reactions the author finds funny.

have a nice day. ;)

o26 * As Oceans

2006-03-20T14:09:00.000+08:00

by Wolfgang

(Take the Wolfgang test here.)

Close your eyes and rise as oceans
breathin' floatin' across tha way
underneath you all sorts and motions
as this blue horizons calls
and no God no man can control where you roam
as the current serves my motor
I'm pushing on now awake
like the ocean fells your waves
tentacles to crush rocks on shores
tides devoid of emotion
all your wonderful dreams washed away
as I stand on the sand being dragged by your hand
like an anchor that's bringing me down
below the water, cause man
he can he can control where you roam
now rest as oceans
be still, yet always in constant motion
quiet yet never afraid
silent yet always awake
and no God or mar can dictate where you stand
no bounderies cast, forever you last
as the ocean calls your name

***

stardusts:

i think the test result gave me this song 'cause i chose Ariel, the little mermaid. haha for kicks! ;p

o25 * we are only human

2006-03-17T09:42:00.000+08:00

the hold up incident jeff and i experienced around a month ago makes me realize now how quickly in a snap we could lose ourlives.
i'm thinking, if the hold-uppers snapped out the tiny bit sanity and control left in their nuts, anyone could've died there in the bus.

we, passengers, had no way out. we had no control of the situation.
they had their "operation" all covered.

luckily, our guardian angels were on duty and kept us protected all through Cubao.

*****

i received an email from my mum this morning. it contained only of nine pictures. no descriptions whatsoever.

six out of the nine pictures were shots of a man ran over by a Fermex bus [NYR-525].

his brain was literally squished out of his head.
kawawa.

everyday, we wake up and the first thing on our mind is work and how we could earn more, if not enough, money. we work so hard to make our lives better, to make your loved ones' lives just a little more comfortable than yesterday. quality time with our family takes the backseat for awhile, you might have thought.

for this man, he woke up that morning to die.
we don't know what he died for, though.

what would you die for?

*****

the human body is so fragile and weak yet most of the time, we forget and we neglect to take care of our bodies.

it's important that we make time to take care of our bodies, and also not to forget to enrich our spiritual lives as well, for our body, without the spirit, is just human meat.

o24 * Oh sooo familiar move...

2006-03-17T09:36:00.000+08:00

How to Steal an Idea

"In a discussion, always summarize the proceedings thus far. You need not have thought up any of the ideas you present. But when you come in with your comment, pick out the interesting ideas earlier presented and synthesize these to move the discussion forward. It is not necessary to acknowledge who said what. This will only confuse the audience and give credit to the wrong person—somebody else."

Source: Power Plays: Notes from the Corporate Bench, a book of essays by business executive and BusinessWorld columnist Antonio R. Samson

***
stardust:
'got this excerpt from Jessica Zafra's blog.

o23 * Psalm 147:4

2006-03-15T10:59:00.000+08:00

"He determines the number of the stars,

and calls them each by name."

*sent to me by an old-time friend..
thanks, skaterboi!

o22 * Ignorance

2006-03-14T11:47:00.000+08:00

read their fried american brains here.

asswipes.

"Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former."
~Albert Einstein

o21 * NASA-an na nga ba tayo..?

2006-03-10T13:06:00.000+08:00

Today there are more opportunities than ever before that await each and every one of you who wants to reach for the stars. In the 21st century, your generation is going to lead the world…and possibly, even leave this world to live on another. These opportunities might lead to adventures such as living on the International Space Station; or working on a research station on a near-Earth asteroid; developing a colony on Mars; or peering thousands of trillions of miles into the vastness of space, looking for Earth-sized planets, and searching for an answer to the big question: Are we alone?

Exploring heavens brings advances here on Earth that we have yet to imagine. But we should also pursue these missions because there’s more to life than survival and consumption. Are these goals bold? Yes. Are the missions risky? Yes. Is there a chance we could fail? You bet.

New frontiers – in space and on Earth – are always risky … and often dangerous. But don't be afraid to dream. Now its your turn. Take your place in history. Join the NASA team.

***

i would only work for America if i would be with NASA or SWAT.
....waaah..! gsuto ko mag-apply!

o2o * the fright of emptiness

2006-03-07T16:09:00.000+08:00

could it be that in strict confinement,
in making me only yours,
that i might eventually feel and become empty?

how would you know the true me?
how would you see my colors?
how would you meet my personalities?
how could we share interests?

..if you do not let me be who i am and who i want to be?

it frightens me.

how could you find nothingness?
how can you love emptiness?

before my colors turn black and grey,
i want you to know me,
i want you to see right through me,
i want you to find me.

as i know you, see you, hear you, find you...

and love you.

o19 * limo

2006-03-07T15:46:00.000+08:00

i remember receiving a similar message to this a couple of years back...

"Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo, but what you need is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down."

-- Oprah Winfrey

o18 * actually..

2006-03-06T15:39:00.000+08:00

i don't really care about you, you know...

you're full of 'press releases'....

sorry.. but i don't buy it.

o17 * coming clean (what she never knew..unless she finds this blog)

2006-03-03T13:53:00.001+08:00

a few secs ago, i was reading a former officemate-sort-of-friend's blog. she's the same realistic-idealist, smart -ass girl i knew. i still love reading her entries since her views always made sense and i learn a lot from her thoughts, whether i agree with them or not, it doesn't matter. unlike some blogs that made me twitch a lot wondering what s/he meant by his/her words. some gave me headache. her entries are also eye-openers especially when in comes to topics that discuss her faith . in actuallity, i admire her for her firm stand on her beliefs and principles.

i was almost done reading her when a very distinct memory popped up into my mind and robbed my attention. oh, i realized how crazy and ignorant i was of the situation and the people involved before the island encounter.

***
let's call her "Sib". Sib lives her life on very high standards. she's very picky and does not want to settle for anything less but the best.. which is fine.. but would make her quest for her ideal man harder.

since she's single and near her 30's, most of our teammates wanted to play cupid. (one, actually, wanted to replace him.) during lunchtime and idle hours, my teammates would pop up names of friends and acquaintances who could and might match Sib's requirements and standards.

among the few recommended men, they kept teasing her to this guy. let's call him "Black".

i remember our teammates telling her that Black is a good-hearted young man who also works within the company but is assigned s0mewhere else (read: he has a stable job). they told her he was single (well, that's far as they know...) and belongs to a rich family (which is good match for Sib since her family is wealthy as well..) yet still remains very true and humble.

i later on found out that their information were true except for one thing... Black was in a long-time pseudo-relationship and was actually semi-open to an offer of a more stable -official relationship.

how did i find out? i was not really paying much attention to the information, until the day the employees were sent to a not-so-far-out island for the annual company outing.

***
i met Black there and in fairness, had a good time.. except that, the supposedly friendship that should have stayed that way developed into something deeper and more exciting over time, a couple of 'small talks' and hot, steamy, sweet, tempting.... caffeinf-filled cups. (what were you thinking?!)

i enjoyed every bit of it, anyways.. and somewhat felt guilty and insecured about for a time, as well.

yes, i realized what my hapiness that time caused Sib. although Sib knew that Black and i became friends since the island getaway, she was clueless of the real score. i would even give her information about Black to keep her interested, ride on her theories why Black is just too shy to ask her out and i even had the nerve to explain or make up an excuse why Black did not make any move to chase her.

bad. tsk, tsk, tsk.

***
"he" or "what we were" is just another story i would rather not expound on about. maybe next time. ;) when i'm ready to come out squeaky clean. ;) haha ..for now, im just coming out clean enough. just enough for you not to mistake me as an uber guilt-free hypocrite.

o16 * war is over

2006-03-03T12:36:00.000+08:00

finally, the 4-day war is over between me and him.
thank heavens, we were able to talk last night brought by an unfortunate event...
his daddy was rushed to the hospital yesterday due to Pleurisy.

Lord, i pray that his dad heals and that they would be able to solve their gap soon.
i pray soon for the latter.

o15 * was clueless

2006-03-02T10:24:00.000+08:00

it didn't cross my mind that my entry post #013 was timely.

it is lenten season once again...
and it's another season to remind us to make that needed change in our lives.

i hope you went out of your way to receive blessing yesterday (ash Wednesday)

wishin' you well always, brother/sister. =)

o14 * coño kid in the making?

2006-02-28T14:50:00.000+08:00

since i'm like so tamad today and i'm like not in the mood to make chika to my friends also,
because i feel so horrible today, i do not know why -
let me chika myself in a very coño accent. ok?

so.. what's up? (afi people, does that sound familiar or what? haha)

i feel so bloated, you know. yeah, yeah. (yeah, yeah??? wtf?!)
yeah, i do. i feel ugly... i may actually look ugly... but i think i feel ugli-err.
haay. must be my pimples. eew, noh..? yulk...
what is it with today?

i feel so sleepy as well. this morning, it seems like i wanted to spend the rest of the day in bed.
duty calls. so i'm up. for a half day of petix in the office.
if i turn into words the expression on my face this morning:
"duh? sige na nga, papasok na ko. hmpf." sabay ngiwi.

it's payday nga pala today. gosh, i'm glad i have extra bucks to pay for my credit card bills.
oh my gah...
you know naman, i need to make sure i have new get-ups for the weekly gimmicks (as if.)

oh.
credit card companies: parasites!

so, let's stop here na lang muna. i really feel sleepy eh.
i'll surf the net na lang muna.. pretend and try to look really busy. ahihi

o13 * Change If Your Beloved Asks You to Change

2006-02-24T12:01:00.000+08:00

by Bo Sanchez

Lately, I’ve been vain.
After five years of being married, my wife has finally convinced me to use a conditioner after a shampoo. Gosh, I feel so worldly.
And would you believe? She’s also convinced me to use lotion for my dry skin.
Arrrrrrgggh!
You just don’t know how uncomfortable I felt making these changes. Let me explain. There was a time when I didn’t even use a deodorant because I felt it was vanity. So you could imagine the devastating presence I had in a crowd. In the words of my closest buddies, I had superpowers. Like famous televangelists, all I had to do was raise my arm and a whole crowd of people would fall before me.
And would you believe? I’ve never put on cologne in my life.
Oh, except for that historic first date when I courted Marowe, my wife today.
When she smelled the scent, she told me the fragrance was fresh and asked me what it was. I told her, “My cologne’s GC.” I never told her what it meant.
When we got married, I finally did tell her: Green Cross cologne.
Yes, I’ve changed.
I now use a hi-tech cell phone, so I can text sweet nothings to her daily.
I dress presentably, so I won’t be mistaken for her driver.
And I use a deodorant, because that was included in our marriage contract.
My point? Love has changed me.
More accurately, my beloved has changed me.
That should happen, if it’s really love.
Does your beloved want you to change certain things in your life? For you to stop smoking? For you to become more gentle in your speech? For you to be more affectionate? For you to stop farting in public?
Prove your love. Change if your beloved asks you to change.
And here’s my bigger point: Does your Beloved in Heaven want you to change certain things in your life?
Prove your love for Him as well. Change if your Divine Beloved asks you to change.

(Source: Fill Your Life With Miracles – Discover God in the Ordinary… and Live Extraordinary, p.69)

***
stardust:

maiba naman tayo ng tema... ;) have a heppy weekend everyone!
magdasal tayo na sana hindi na lumala ang Pilipinas.

o12 * Police Report #1 - Na-hold up kami sa Victory Liner bus kagabi...

2006-02-20T12:51:00.000+08:00

people, please please be careful..!!!
...madaming mga gago at halang ang bituka sa panahon na ito.

mabuti na lang at around 2k lang ang nkuha sa pocket ni boifriend, celphone nya at kwintas ko lang ang nakuha samen.. mabuti na din na tig-iisang suntok lang ang inabot namin (na hindi naman namin deserve dahil mga behave kaming victims)...

mabuti na lang din na buhay pa kami... (Thank you so much, Lord.)

mas mautak pa din ako sa kanila, naitago ko ang 10k ni boifriend, watch at celphone ko.. at buti na lang din na naiwan ko yung hikaw ko at lahat ng pera ko sa Pampanga.. kung hindi, nakupow, simot sarap ang bulsa ko.

mga leche sila, ang lalaki ng katawan, hindi maghanap ng maayos na trabaho. mga kupal.

please, please... always be alert.. and do not forget to pray.

o11 * Next to You

2006-02-20T12:46:00.000+08:00

by Kenny Rankin and Dan Siegal

If I had me a bag of good wishes
There's no mystery to what I would do
I would use all my magical powers
And try to get next to you

I would bring you a field of flowers
As your lucky star would do
With my heart I would paint you a rainbow
If I could get next to you

There's so much we can share
However far too long

We both know that there's so much here
This is where I belong

Late at night when I close my eyes
Make believin' that you are here
Dreamin' of the things we do
If I could get next to you

In my mind, Ooh ooh, I have kissed you
And it feels like a thousand times
I'd lose track of all the hours
Dreamin' I'm next to you

This is where I belong

Late at night when I close my eyes
Make believin' that you are here
Dreamin' of the things we do
If I could get next to you

In my mind, Ooh ooh, I have kissed you
And it feels like a thousand times
I'd lose track of all the hours
Wishing and hoping
That I could get next to you

***
stardust:
whoever has an mp3 of this, please send me a copy.... please, please, please..? =) mat-sala!

o1o * even blogthings.com agrees with me...

2006-02-15T16:39:00.000+08:00

Your Job Dissatisfaction Level is 32%

Your job is not bad, but it's probably not a long term thing.
You're just not happy enough to stick around for too long...
And there's little that can change how you feel.
Start looking around for other options, but only quit for something really good!

Should You Quit Your Job?

oo9 * unhappy

2006-02-15T13:37:00.000+08:00

i'm realizing how dull my life is lately.

tek was a huge reason why i felt happy.

now that we're fighting over a mistake that he does not want to admit and a temper he does not want to tame, i'm torn between rational thinking and just wanting to have a peace of mind.

i've become tired of the fights.

i am becoming someone i do not like.

oo8 * prayers for a soul

2006-02-14T16:08:00.000+08:00

A news that is stronger than coffee woke me up today.

PO1 Francis "Al" Camba, a good friend of mine, died today.

May his soul rest in peace in God's kingdom.

***
comet's tail:

I do not know the whole story yet. The company requests that our company's employee's presence in Makati Med and the precinct, where some of our colleagues are being questioned, be minimized.

oo7 * life is beautiful

2006-02-13T14:07:00.000+08:00

"life is beautiful.... when you're full," i candidly blurted out yesterday over lunch at a MOA signing after feeling good about not eating too much. i wasn't hungry at all since i just had a heavy early lunch at 10:30am.

a colleague chuckled on what she heard from me and commented, "wow, nag-rhyme pa.." i thought it was funny too.. but if we are to take what i said to another level, we'd realize that it is true in many ways.

how can life be beautiful if there are thousands of people out there unfed..?

***

yesterday, between witnessing the signing of agreements between project partners and a colleague whispering to me how ambitious "the project" is in connecting all high schools to the internet, i prayed that this project would succeed and indeed somehow serve its pupose - that by connecting the schools to the internet and improving their students' education, the project would help its intended beneficiaries find employment to feed their families.

although one point in case, just as hanna pointed out before in one of our conversations, how can social work groups think of raising this much money to connect all schools to the internet if their immediate need is food, water and shelter..? ..why would you think of connecting them to the internet when many children, including their parents, cannot read a single sentence or a single word..?

***

going further, the world we live in is suffering from starvation. not just the kind that could be sufficed by food and water, or a candy bar; it's the kind of hunger that comes from the soul. with the kind of world we live in and the range of principles we are offered to adopt today, our soul's immediate need might not necessarily be evangelization, but values formation.

our world is hungry for love... it is hungry for unity... for peace.

***

the soul of our world hungers for the Truth!

***

coincidentally, when i was drafting this entry, i read a former classmate's blog entry at her multiply site. for a well-written related literature, please click here and find the entry "My Wowowee".

***
stardust:

this entry reminds me of the flick we watched in college. if you haven't seen "Life is Beautiful", go to your nearest Tower Records or Music One and grab an original copy. if a copy is not available or if you're experiencing financial drought, feel free to drop by at Quiapo and buy a pirated a copy. ;) it's a touching movie.

oo6 * Dead Dog Walking

2006-02-09T14:24:00.000+08:00

Bailey acquired a certain disease known as distemper.

It is a contagious, incurable, often fatal, multisystemic viral disease that affects the respiratory, gastrointestinal, and central nervous systems. Distemper is caused by the canine distemper virus (CDV). Canine distemper occurs worldwide, and once was the leading cause of death in unvaccinated puppies. Young puppies between 3 and 6 months old are most susceptible to infection and disease and are more likely to die than infected adults.
(Source: http://www.animalhealthchannel.com/distemper/)

***
Bailey is owned by my cousin Chec and her now pseudo-boyfriend Nathan. When they bought him, the former owner said that he had Bailey complete the vaccines, so there shouldn't be any problems. They bought him before Nathan left for Korea to work.

Bailey is a mix of breeds labrador and golden retriever. He's huge. He was always nice and sweet. He would bring you an offering in a form of a basahan or any available thing that he finds on the floor as soon as he senses you entering the house. Sometimes it's his dentbone.

Together with the other two loudmouths, Spyder and Piccha, he would wag his tail excitedly and endlessly walk around you until you scratch his body and tell him "Bailey, give me." By then, he should be handing over to you the basahan as a sign of surrender. He would think he deserves a pat on the back, so you should tell him "Good daaawwg." [Does this remind you of teh US of A and the Philippine government..? But that's another story...]

That was how he was. Until he caught distemper.

***
The first thing my Tita Chat (Chec's mum) noticed was an uncontrollable jerking on Bailey's head. Now, the rest of his body jerks as if he's having hiccups 24 hours. He also had on and off fever. Then loss of appetite soon followed and he seemed like a depressed dog.

Chec suspects that the former owner lied to them about Bailey having been able to get all the necessary vaccines. I suspect that even the former owner did not know what Bailey needed. He did not know ALL the vaccines he had to give his dogs.

***
Bailey's situation is getting worse by the day. Eventhough the vet says that Bailey cannot feel any pain from this disease, we sense that Bailey is having a very hard time. He could not eat, drink, stand up or run at all. You think he's in love..? NO. He's very sick and he's not happy.

Although I don't support the mere idea, Chec and Tita Chat are already considering the option of inducing something to Bailey to make him fall asleep and die painlessly. Yes, euthanasia. (Aaarghh! Dammit. Just typing it makes me want to puke.) And they might just do it with a help of a vet this coming weekend.

Please pray for Bailey.
We loved him. We still love him.
Please know that we (lalo na ako) regret whatever is happening now
and whatever might happen to him soon.

*****
To the reader:

If you're an owner of puppies or full-blown dogs, whether they have breed or just plain askals (asong kalye) and you really love them so much... well.. even if you don't... please, please have them vaccinated.

Even when your pets don't tell you they're sick...

If you know anyone who owns pets, well especially dogs in this case, encourage them to have their pets checked by the vet.

Bug them to death!!!

Thanks.

Denise

oo5 * Lady of Strength

2006-02-03T18:30:00.000+08:00

You Are Strength

You represent both fiery energy and steadfast will.You are innocent and naive - yet unafraid and undaunted.Perhaps you don't have the most powerful physical strength...But your mental powers make up for any amount of muscle.
Your fortune:
Lately, you have been a pillar of ethics and moral strength.And while things may be difficult, your faith in yourself will come through.You may need to conquer the animalistic nature of yourself or others, with gentle force.Although this may seem like the darkest hour for you, victory is near.

What Tarot Card Are You?

You Are Lightning

Beautiful yet dangerousPeople will stop and watch you when you appearEven though you're capable of random violence
You are best known for: your power
Your dominant state: performing

What Type of Weather Are You?

oo4 * OT

2006-01-27T20:58:00.000+08:00

OverTime + OverTawad + OverThinking
+ Over sTaying +

grabe, i'm still here in the office... still trying to print all the needed materials included in the press kit, which will be distributed at the program launch that we're going to have exactly a week away from today.

haay.

i'm tired.. but just like what i told Vic in YM a while ago, which i also used as my stat,

overtime is also the price of doing and enjoying what you love to do.

nevermind the eyebags, nevermind hunger, nevermind thirst, nevermind the headache, nevermind being tired, nevermind health (sometimes, this really becomes the case), nevermind if your overstaying will not be paid..... nevermind if you fall asleep at your desk... nevermind if your boss won't even notice.... nevermind if when you come home all you would want to do is lay down and sleep... nevermind the laundry, the dirty dishes, the dogs, the dust....

for as long as you're enjoying what you are doing, nevermind all that.

am i beginning to sound like a maniac..?

..hehe

nah,, just hungry. ;)

but i've proven one thing ::: i really am more productive at night.

mcoy was right, i am nocturnal.

oo3 * Me

2006-01-26T19:29:00.000+08:00

by: Jewel Kilcher
note: this is one of my favorite poems by Jewel.

I.
I have blonde hair
I pluck my eyebrows
I have my father's nose
my mother's hands
I have crooked teeth
and green eyes
I play guitar
I used to get sick a lot
I like the color of wine
I've cheated on boyfriends
I've owned fake ID
But my hair is still blonde
and my teeth are still crooked
and I probably won't always likethe color of wine

II.
I have firm breasts
I have lips that always smile
I have veins that bleed
I laugh when I'm nervous
I feel the pain of others
but cry for no reason
I like open flame
I've been selfish since a child
I'm from Alaska
but hate the cold
I've cheated on diets
I've faked applications
But I still bleed
and my lips still smile
and my breasts won't always be firm

III.
I have strong shoulders
I have olive skin
I have a Swiss face I borrowed from my grandmother
I have long nails on my right hand
which break regularly
My little toe is strange
I write
I used to make wreaths from dandelions
I brush my hair before bed
I cheated on tests
I faked flirtatious French accents
But I still have gold skin
and my nails still break
and I probably won't always have strong shoulders
and I may not always write
But maybe I'll start
making wreaths
from dandelions again

***(^_^)***

oo2 * Gutom na ko.

2006-01-25T18:02:00.000+08:00

i'm really starving. (#_#) i'm waiting for a meeting to conclude so we could proceed to Kitchen at Greenbelt 3 for a free dinner. :p [lol]

i fetched our American guests from their hotel a while ago. i don't really enjoy babysitting foreigners on their business visits. it's like i am expected to act like a tour guide - know landscape we pass by on, when i, myself, needs a tour.

thank heavens, leo accompanied me.

we walked from paseo de roxas (where are building is) to makati avenue (where one can find a short cut to manila peninsula) along ayala avenue. thanks heavens, again, that the rain has decided to stop already...

i don't like bringing umbrellas. bringing an umbrella is like bringing another document folder with me.. but, of course, the convenience it brings when a heavy rain starts pouring in is certainly appreciated.

can anyone invent a more portable umbrella..?

i'm really, really starving.

oo1 * Stars and Satellite

2006-01-25T13:57:00.000+08:00

i found myself waking up unhappy today.
then, i found myself preparing for office work today..
'tho i don't really intend to work.
i just needed to be in the office.

boredom sets in, as usual. thank heavens, there is internet.

i found myself creating a new Multiply site.
i found my mind playing with words...
seeking words that would project an imagery of my world..
or maybe how i feel today..
or maybe what i am fond of.. of what i am interested in.

natalie imbruglia's "Satellite" was on repeat mode.

"Do you lie awake / In the morning / Trying to find / A reason to call me / 'Cause honey / All that I've been doing / Is thinking about your smile...

'Cause you are my Satellite / So I'm trying to / Keep you in sight / But with all this space / Can we keep it alive / Keep it alive / So I'm asking you baby / Are you coming down tonight,"

-- she said.

i played it over and over again....

TAG! .... "stars and satellite".

i'm trashing the multiply site...

***
Welcome to My Universe.. =)

Here you will find:
me - the star and the satellite; and
my story - well, at least my version of stories.

*so why "stars and satellites"..?

aside from being nocturnal on most nights, i have always enjoyed a night of star-filled skies and, the perfect sudden appearances and fadings of a comet [or shooting star as some call them].. i love meeting the different faces of the earth's satellite.. since childhood, i have been fascinated by heavenly bodies.. i remember having a book about the sun, the moon, earth and the other planets, and other heavenly stuff up there, and the galaxies that crowds the Universe..

***
Comet's Tail:

blogging.. is when you create a planet of your own where you can speak freely..
where one can be intelligent and smart then be dumb the next second... to become deep then shallow the next minute... stubborn, cold-hearted and harsh then very appreciative the next morning.. where you can be sad and melancholic then be happy...

but the irony in it is that,
you create your own world for yourself where no one should find you,
but it is also where everyone can find you...
and in the process, you would meet new friends who share almost the same experiences or sentiments..

you are found!

..and a time might come when you would want to be heard...
so you start asking around who among your friends are blogging...
then you exchange addresses...

by this time, you are exposed.